At some point, the day comes when you have to say goodbye to your beloved furry friend. I am convinced that our dogs show us when the moment has come. With our mindfulness and attention, we recognise this very well.
Before we went to the clinic, Csasi lay in her favourite bed and looked at me in a way that somehow said it all. We humans always interpret a lot, but I'm sure she knew that the time had come.
We had been thinking about ‘letting our dog go’ for several weeks beforehand. She was finding it increasingly difficult to climb the stairs (she was completely out of breath when going up), she could hardly manage to walk down the stairs and would occasionally fall down the last two or three steps. Of course, we only let her walk up and down the stairs when absolutely necessary, but carrying the 30kg up and down every day was unfortunately impossible, especially for me. Even getting up after lying down became more and more difficult and she had trouble sorting her hind paws.
The most difficult thing for us was that she was totally fit in the head. She was as funny as ever, was incredibly happy when we were about to feed her or going for a walk and she was still fully involved in everything despite her deafness. Even if she sometimes fell over her legs while walking, she simply got up again and carried on.
On 26 August she had an unusually swollen hind paw early in the morning. The vet said a short time later that it didn't look very good and the paw would have to be punctured. We were referred further to the Aarau West veterinary clinic. There it was decided to keep Csasca overnight in the hope of reducing the fever and getting the infection under control. The vet was confident, as it was a bacterial infection and could be well controlled with antibiotics.
With our many years of experience with Csasca's history, we already knew at this point that she and her immune deficiency would not simply get better. Urs and I talked it over the evening before and decided that we didn't want to let Csasca suffer or put her through the medical mill again.
The next morning we received confirmation: The fever was down - the paw was worse. That would have meant exactly what we didn't want - X-rays, MRI, cutting open the paw to relieve the pressure, etc.. After consulting with our two trusted vets, we decided that we wanted to put Csasca down and made an appointment for the euthanasia. That evening we travelled to the clinic and I was so incredibly relieved that Csasca was in a really bad state. That may sound very inhumane, but it was a relief. She seemed tired, almost apathetic, her paw looked terrible and she greeted us very reservedly and not Csasca like at all. The vet took an incredible amount of time and effort and guided us through the euthanasia process with admirable empathy and calm. Csasca was allowed to fall asleep peacefully.
To be honest, our vets are my heroes. We really had a vet odyssey with Csasca and all the vets were dedicated to our dog with a lot of passion, heart and soul and great expertise. We would like to take this opportunity to say a big THANK YOU to:
Dr Martin Rohdewald, MD, Dr Yuri Béosier, MD, Flurina Salis, MD, Cornelius von Werthern, MD, Jürg Bolliger, MD, Marion Sax, MD, Carmen Füglistaller, MD, Lisa Leuthard, MD, Isabelle Iff, MD, Martin Keiser, MD. Thanks also to Dr Voss and Dr Schwarz, who accompanied Csasca wonderfully on her last two days, even though they didn't know her.
I admire you for your patience, your empathy, your loving way of dealing with the animals and your expertise. Animals can't explain what's wrong with them, so it's all the more difficult to make a diagnosis. I know from my job that people's expectations are sometimes impossible to fulfil. I have the utmost respect for what you do. THANK YOU.
A heartfelt thank you also goes to all the VPAs who devotedly looked after Csasca during her hospitalisation.
THANK YOU to all the people who supported us during these not always so easy 13 years with Csasca, who showed a lot of understanding when we had to say no to many fun things to do and who stood by us with advice.
Thank you for supporting us even now in these days of great emptiness.
You are all simply wonderful.